"Adults and children sometimes have boards in their bedrooms or living-rooms on which they pin pieces of paper: letters, snapshots, reproductions of paintings, newspaper cuttings, original drawings, postcards. On each board all the images belong to the same language and all are more or less equal within it, because they have been chosen in a highly personal way to match and express the experience of the room's inhabitant. Logically, these boards should replace museums."
-John Berger from Ways of Seeing (The book, not the BBC specials)
Let's replace the board in this quote from John Berger with facebook. Though people certainly do use boards to pin up things in this way, the idea could be extended to some extent to interior decorating in general. Anyway, I agree with Berger about personalized spaces taking on the role of museums. While seeing the original is still the ideal, I can't make it out to the Louvre every time I want to take a look at the Mona Lisa.
In the particular case of the Mona Lisa, I have actually had more fulfilling experiences looking at reproductions than at the actual thing. It's relatively small, and on an average day at the Louvre, it is surrounded by people including a Louvre employee whose job it is to prevent any pictures from being taken. "No photo! No camera!" This is not an environment that is conducive to any sort of meditative contemplation. I'd rather look at a good reproduction in a book alone in silence. So the ideal here, seeing the original in a distraction-free environment, isn't even possible in a museum.
That is really tangential to my actual point though. Museums are where art goes to die. There are instances of new media installations which are an exception, but for the two dimensional art world, I believe this is the case. Let us compare what happens to a good photograph on facebook and what happens to a good photograph in a museum. On facebook, after a photo album is posted, a whole microcosm of social activity begins to occur around the images. People comment and discuss the content of the photographs. People use some of the images as their profile pictures. I find this very significant. The profile picture is an alias, it represents the person. It is a substitute for their physical presence. This is a relatively new and profound use for photographs. You get to choose a photograph that will act as a surrogate you.
Contrast this to a print in a museum which will be quietly passed over by people who most likely already have some idea of how they feel about it. There's much less activity in the museum. The function of the art doesn't evolve. It is just a reference point. It sits there as if to say, "yes, there is an original that does exist and it is here." Elsewhere, in books, on desktop backgrounds, on bedroom walls, the image is functioning out in the world, making impressions, contributing to personalized contexts, generating conversation... but in the museum it sits, remaining the same.
I think the future of art, or at least the relevant future of art is on the internet, in living rooms, in bedrooms and in books.
Don't feel like proofreading this right now. Fuck it.
20090417
20090214
a thought rolling over on itself like a snowball tumbling into an avalanche: barely structured ideas on valentines day
I just saw an ad that said, "Texting at Church? TXT3 is a new worshiping experience..."
My reaction occurred to me visually before it took on a description. The vision was that of a member of the clergy pissing into a bottle of wine. The use of communication age technology to engage in Christian worshiping exercises seems extremely counterintuitive. Then again, most everything about religion seems counterintuitive to me. Alas.
Technology is pure but not sacred. Religion is not pure but it is sacred. Technology is pure because it is objective. It carries no implicit judgment and is external to morality. Thus, hypocrisy is an impossibility. Religion is sacred because it is old and tends to, or at least pre-tends to, stay the same. It centers on cycles and recurrences. It is based on tradition and it posits a morality which its members are sporadically faithful to.
Technology is not sacred because it is not nostalgic. Though technology operates in cycles, its overall movement is linear. It progresses and adapts to changes in its environment, just like the Darwinian model of a species. Religion is not pure because it is inconsistent. Its doctrines and its history are polluted with contradiction.
The problem with religion is that it is largely non-adaptive. It is rigid. It cannot improvise in a dynamic environment. Religion would be a terrible jazz musician. Technology exists only to address its dynamic environment. Quite ironically, the idea of technology would be terrible at executing repetitive tasks (as opposed to the actual physical manifestation of technology which mostly used to execute repetitive tasks with an extremely high degree of accuracy).
The problem with technology is that it is cold. Nazism was a technological society in this sense. Certain people were deemed less effective as others, and the others were overworked and abused until they died. Though the basis for judging who was effective and who was not was essentially flawed because it was based on baseless intolerance, the course of action was coldly rational. If you had a tool that you meant to replace, you might still use it until it gives out completely. If you had a country full of Jews, you might throw them into labor camps until they die. This is the danger of purely progressive, i.e. technological thinking.
What we need is sacredness--a nostalgia for life and the absence of suffering. The problem is that we need to arrive at that nostalgia through the same type of reasoning that led to the holocaust. I am confident that such a thing is possible. Reasoning is impartial. I feel that pragmatism will serve as a segue into a progressive ideology that has room for sacredness and thus, will have safeguards against abuse.
Pragmatism is the marriage of intuition and reasoning. If we think pragmatically long enough, I think that collectively our seemingly separate, intuition-driven conclusions will reveal an underlying system or ideology that can can unite thought as religion once did.
Speaking of linear progression, I am way off from where I started. Apparently I need to develop a nostalgia for how I begin my writing. Oh well. Americans never look back.
My reaction occurred to me visually before it took on a description. The vision was that of a member of the clergy pissing into a bottle of wine. The use of communication age technology to engage in Christian worshiping exercises seems extremely counterintuitive. Then again, most everything about religion seems counterintuitive to me. Alas.
Technology is pure but not sacred. Religion is not pure but it is sacred. Technology is pure because it is objective. It carries no implicit judgment and is external to morality. Thus, hypocrisy is an impossibility. Religion is sacred because it is old and tends to, or at least pre-tends to, stay the same. It centers on cycles and recurrences. It is based on tradition and it posits a morality which its members are sporadically faithful to.
Technology is not sacred because it is not nostalgic. Though technology operates in cycles, its overall movement is linear. It progresses and adapts to changes in its environment, just like the Darwinian model of a species. Religion is not pure because it is inconsistent. Its doctrines and its history are polluted with contradiction.
The problem with religion is that it is largely non-adaptive. It is rigid. It cannot improvise in a dynamic environment. Religion would be a terrible jazz musician. Technology exists only to address its dynamic environment. Quite ironically, the idea of technology would be terrible at executing repetitive tasks (as opposed to the actual physical manifestation of technology which mostly used to execute repetitive tasks with an extremely high degree of accuracy).
The problem with technology is that it is cold. Nazism was a technological society in this sense. Certain people were deemed less effective as others, and the others were overworked and abused until they died. Though the basis for judging who was effective and who was not was essentially flawed because it was based on baseless intolerance, the course of action was coldly rational. If you had a tool that you meant to replace, you might still use it until it gives out completely. If you had a country full of Jews, you might throw them into labor camps until they die. This is the danger of purely progressive, i.e. technological thinking.
What we need is sacredness--a nostalgia for life and the absence of suffering. The problem is that we need to arrive at that nostalgia through the same type of reasoning that led to the holocaust. I am confident that such a thing is possible. Reasoning is impartial. I feel that pragmatism will serve as a segue into a progressive ideology that has room for sacredness and thus, will have safeguards against abuse.
Pragmatism is the marriage of intuition and reasoning. If we think pragmatically long enough, I think that collectively our seemingly separate, intuition-driven conclusions will reveal an underlying system or ideology that can can unite thought as religion once did.
Speaking of linear progression, I am way off from where I started. Apparently I need to develop a nostalgia for how I begin my writing. Oh well. Americans never look back.
20080506
high school artifacts
I was cleaning out my edweb account and found an artifact worth sharing. Freshman year in my rhetoric and composition class, we had 'creativity day.' We were supposed to bring in something we've written or come talk about something we liked. I brought in some creative writing I did in high school back when I had emotions. These were originally stored on a hard drive that failed long ago, taking with it all of the ridiculous shit I had done in high school (thank god), but now, a little of it is back, and is posted below for your enjoyment. It is very high school.
Also, I was pleasantly surprised to find my astronaut motif pop up even though it's in a completely different context.
Flush
Oh Jack of hearts,
Take it from a friend,
You’re value does not surpass the king,
And the lady plays to win,
Oh Nine, I know,
But isn’t there a way,
The lady, she is easily met,
But her suit is not easily swayed,
The king of clubs does not lose his bets,
And he knows Jack, he knows,
Get back in the deck,
It’s your only hope,
She can not love you,
I envy you, Nine,
Your spades serve you straight,
You have no deception of your value,
No illusion of your state,
Jack, I know your tragedy,
You can never be any more,
Than a precursor to your obsession,
Pray they play twenty-one,
She might flirt with you a little,
But just for a bit of fun,
The lady belongs to her man,
She fucks the ace,
I’ve seen them, Nine,
Your spades must know it too,
She lusts for him,
Despite the king,
Why can’t I be her lover,
Tell me the truth,
My dear jack,
Your only eye has left you ignorant,
You’re a victim of your condition,
One that no card envies,
But no card lacks,
Don’t bullshit me, Nine,
I don’t want a friend’s lies,
I want a liar’s facts,
Fine then Jack, here it is,
Your face gives you confidence,
But your hearts do you no good,
A queen needs to be overlooked,
Overlooked and misunderstood,
Here’s your problem, Jack,
You’re just too easy for a lady as black as the queen of hearts is good,
Untitled
Mr. Frisky’s father died in the twilight of an October evening. He left behind a water bowl, and an unsettling mixture of feelings. The clouds were warm and violet, just the way he would have liked. I can still see him looking into the air, and smiling into the light. At night, he’d sometimes stray away, but he always returned by the eighth hour of the very next Thursday. The time is 12:57 on a Saturday afternoon, and the only sign we have of him is his first-born, pure-bred son. Mr. Frisky is looking up to me, his eyes screaming, “Where has my father gone?”
From that moment on, Timmy never trusted God. He died in 1987 when his helicopter ran out of gas somewhere over Minnesota.
The End of an Astronaut
“Oh God! What is this place and how did I arrive?” asked Dr. Tracey.
Dr. Tracy stands amongst his comrades in an aged crater. All around him are prisms suspended by unseen forces dispersed amongst stalagmites of incredible height. Tracy’s companions do not stir, so he presumes them dead. He proceeds to walk about. Voices are coming from everywhere. None are discernable. Dr. Tracy’s head begins to ache as the weight of the air infiltrates his mind. He stumbles. The voices grow louder. The prisms blur. He looks up to find that they have begun to melt into pools of silvery reflections. Dr. Tracy falls on his side, his face half buried in dirt. The melted prisms begin to creep around his cheek and mouth. They are cold and sting his face. Dr. Tracy hears a shuffling behind his back. He strains his neck, but is unable to turn his head. Five sets of teeth grip the flesh on his legs. To Dr. Tracy’s surprise, his companions are not dead.
Also, I was pleasantly surprised to find my astronaut motif pop up even though it's in a completely different context.
Flush
Oh Jack of hearts,
Take it from a friend,
You’re value does not surpass the king,
And the lady plays to win,
Oh Nine, I know,
But isn’t there a way,
The lady, she is easily met,
But her suit is not easily swayed,
The king of clubs does not lose his bets,
And he knows Jack, he knows,
Get back in the deck,
It’s your only hope,
She can not love you,
I envy you, Nine,
Your spades serve you straight,
You have no deception of your value,
No illusion of your state,
Jack, I know your tragedy,
You can never be any more,
Than a precursor to your obsession,
Pray they play twenty-one,
She might flirt with you a little,
But just for a bit of fun,
The lady belongs to her man,
She fucks the ace,
I’ve seen them, Nine,
Your spades must know it too,
She lusts for him,
Despite the king,
Why can’t I be her lover,
Tell me the truth,
My dear jack,
Your only eye has left you ignorant,
You’re a victim of your condition,
One that no card envies,
But no card lacks,
Don’t bullshit me, Nine,
I don’t want a friend’s lies,
I want a liar’s facts,
Fine then Jack, here it is,
Your face gives you confidence,
But your hearts do you no good,
A queen needs to be overlooked,
Overlooked and misunderstood,
Here’s your problem, Jack,
You’re just too easy for a lady as black as the queen of hearts is good,
Untitled
Mr. Frisky’s father died in the twilight of an October evening. He left behind a water bowl, and an unsettling mixture of feelings. The clouds were warm and violet, just the way he would have liked. I can still see him looking into the air, and smiling into the light. At night, he’d sometimes stray away, but he always returned by the eighth hour of the very next Thursday. The time is 12:57 on a Saturday afternoon, and the only sign we have of him is his first-born, pure-bred son. Mr. Frisky is looking up to me, his eyes screaming, “Where has my father gone?”
From that moment on, Timmy never trusted God. He died in 1987 when his helicopter ran out of gas somewhere over Minnesota.
The End of an Astronaut
“Oh God! What is this place and how did I arrive?” asked Dr. Tracey.
Dr. Tracy stands amongst his comrades in an aged crater. All around him are prisms suspended by unseen forces dispersed amongst stalagmites of incredible height. Tracy’s companions do not stir, so he presumes them dead. He proceeds to walk about. Voices are coming from everywhere. None are discernable. Dr. Tracy’s head begins to ache as the weight of the air infiltrates his mind. He stumbles. The voices grow louder. The prisms blur. He looks up to find that they have begun to melt into pools of silvery reflections. Dr. Tracy falls on his side, his face half buried in dirt. The melted prisms begin to creep around his cheek and mouth. They are cold and sting his face. Dr. Tracy hears a shuffling behind his back. He strains his neck, but is unable to turn his head. Five sets of teeth grip the flesh on his legs. To Dr. Tracy’s surprise, his companions are not dead.
20080218
The 2 Year Survey: Installation, The Fourth
So every two years, I fill out this survey. I filled it out the first time when I was sixteen and my girlfriend at the time (the lovely Camila Matos) sent it to me. Early on it becomes fairly obvious that it was written for a girl, but most of the questions are not gender specific. As for the ones that are gender specific, it is interesting to see how my answers to those have changed over the years (and how the female specific questions have become less and less applicable).
So there are four answers to each question--the first from when I was 16, the second from when I was 18, third 20 and fourth 22. I'm not sure how I remember to fill this thing out every other Spring, but I do.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1.first name:
Trip (as of yesterday)
John
John
John
2.middle name:
Douglas (yea, it may sound funny, but it was a Scottish tribe that slaughtered a whole bunch of ppl, coo, huh)
Douglas
Douglas, and it was a clan, not a tribe.
Douglas
3.last name:
Clendenenenenenenenenenenenenenenenen.....
Clendenen
Clendenen, which is derived from The House of Gwendolyn which was part of the Douglas clan.
Clendenen
4.Have you ever been in love?:
Every chance I get
yes
Unfortunately.
Yes
5.do you have a crush?
I suppose, but I consider that an understatement by now :)
no
God no, also I think I actually had a crush on Andrea the last time I filled this out but chose not to mention it.
No
6.do you think your crush likes you?
no, she loathes my very existence, don't you Kami :P
N/A
N/A
N/A
7.could you ever be a lesbian?:
its at this point, I wonder why I was asked to fill this out.
at times i do think myself to be a lesbian trapped within the confines of a man's body
I watched Tootsie the other day and decided that I was indeed a lesbian trapped in a man's body. I wonder what it would be like to have sex dressed as a woman. I do seriously think about this.
No
8.top or bottom?:
I was always fond of tops as a child
is this a self esteem question
I really don't know how to answer that.
What?
9.victoria's secrets or fredricks of hollywood?:
none of the above
i don't wear underwear, and i don't really know what fredricks of hollywood is
I don't know how to answer this either.
What?
10.what color lipstick do you wear?:
whatever kind a girl asks me to
i prefer lip gloss
Usually a red.
Don't.
11.do you wear make up?:
well, there was this one time....
on occasion
When I'm in that kind of mood.
No
12.what are you wearing right now?
jeans, t-shirt, boxers, shoes, socks
scrubs, undershirt
A t-shirt that says "Fuck me I'm famous Ibiza" with women's dickies, a belt and my black panther slippers.
Hoodie, t-shirt, jeans and boots.
13.spit or swallow?:
sorry, I'm not that flexible
not my decision
There really is something more sexually appealing about a woman swallowing, but I'm not one to suggest or request something like that.
Neither
14.who do you love?:
ppl who aren't related to me
people, though not all of them
I'm not going to list all of you, but I'm sure you can figure it out, and if you aren't sure, then give me a call and ask. Also, my first answer to this question is kind of fucked up.
Several individuals to varying degrees.
15.what's your fav. color?:
I have no use for such a thing
selenium
I'm going to have to stick with selenium tone on Ilford glossy warmtone fiber paper.
Red
16.do you want to have kids?:
for dinner perhaps
no
No.
No
17.who do you look like?:
the boy in the mirror, hes been haunting me all my life
a fuckass
Do I look like anyone in particular? I don't think I do.
John Heder (or so I am told)
18.who are your friends?:
yea, this is where yout trick me into leaving someone out and then they get all pissed, you know who you are ppl
who is anyone
I hate these kinds of questions. You know who you are.
They are college-aged, middle class americans.
19.shower or bath?:
alone or....
shower
Shower, I have no patience for baths.
Shower
20.haircut?:
yes
no
I do need one if that's what this question is about.
I just got one yesterday. It is medium length and Amanda Klaus thinks I look like a girl.
21.haircolor?:
brown
still brown
You guessed it.
Brown
22.piercings?:
0
i used to have two on my left ear, but they have healed
No updates here, although I had forgotten that I at one time had a pierced ear.
None.
23.tattooes?:
they washed off
no
I had some temporary ones a few weeks ago actually.
None.
24.what's your fav. animal?:
all of them, they have more of a right to be alive than humans
i don't really prefer any one
Cats.
Cats.
25.are you angelina jolie or winona ryder?:
Hedwig
i am neither as far as i know
Keira Knightly!
Neither.
26.when's the last time you cried?:
hmm, 2, 3, maybe 4 years ago.
Sunday i think
When I found out my cat died (see a few posts back).
Don't know.
27.when's the last time you got high?:
first day of school, well, illegally anyway
um, allie, when did we see kill bill?
Two nights ago.
Around 6 weeks ago.
28.when's the last time you got drunk?
don't think I've ever actually gotten to the 'drunk' stage, severely buzzed at most
eh, when me, nick, and john went to john's beach house and it wasn't good
Two nights ago, although I had some wine earlier tonight.
Three days ago (a Saturday)
29.when's the last time you kissed someone?
last night
two sundays ago
I kiss lots of people on the head and cheek, but if that doesn't count, then March or April.
Two months ago.
30.do you bite your nails?:
when they get too long
far too much
Yes, I have done so ever since I learned what a bad habit was in kindergarten and realized that I didn't have one.
Yes, constantly.
31.what's your cutest attribute?:
well, theres this patch of skin at the end of my pinky finger that is about an 1/8 of an inch in diameter that I am incredibly fond of
some say my hair, some my eyes, some my attire, i say it's my arrogance
I'm not sure I'm qualified to answer this. I am told that my cheek bones are spot on though.
I haven't been cute in years.
32.do you believe in god?:
only when hes me
god is best used as a poetic device as far as im concerned
Yes, but I don't think he exists (Yeah that's right, fuck you St. Anselm, you're full of fallacious shit).
No.
33.coke or Pepsi?
cyanide
i drink water mostly
I read a study where they conducted the Pepsi challenge and measured the subjects' brain activity with an fMRI. Apparently, Pepsi is more pleasurable to drink if you don't know what you're drinking, but the cultural implications of Coke make it the preference of most Americans. I prefer Coke because I think cultural implications are just as relevant to a beverage as its chemical affect on the brain.
Coke.
34.do you have any pets?
yes, a completely black cat named Evil
evil and booboo
Evil and Booboo are both dead. I have no pets.
Donna.
35.what kind of car do you drive?:
the kind that dreams are made of
black t100 truck with a cover on the back
A green Ford Explorer which I call Little Green. RIP Big Black.
Ford Explorer.
36.hot or cold?:
depends on the location
hot
Hot, but just because it's cold right now.
Cold.
37.rain or snow?:
snow
snow
Snow.
Snow.
38.do you have any zits right now?:
c'mon, its one of my few insecurities, although the meds help a lot. um, dormant or active?
not too many
Probably somewhere.
Small ones.
39.are you crazy?:
I'd like to think so
i don't like that question
Probably.
Getting there.
40.what color are your eyes?:
blue I think
blue, green, and brown
Primarily blue and green, although there is a brown spot in one of them.
Blue and green with a spot of brown.
41.what's your natural hair color?:
brown
brown
Still brown.
Brown.
42.are you tan or pale?:
pale
pale
Moderately pale.
Pale, but not pasty.
43.how tall are you?:
taller than 5'7" apparently
around 6' with my plats on
Six feet.
Between 5' 11" and 6'
44.how much do you weigh?:
somewhere inbetween 120 and 125 depending on how long ago I ate
130
If I had to guess, I'd say about 135.
I haven't weighed myself for a very long time, but I think I'm 150.
45.what's you're favorite pair of shoes?:
the ones on my feet
the ones they used to have at leopard lounge until i got enough money to buy them
My payless dress shoes.
My black boots.
46.what's your fav. movie?:
right now, probably hedwig, but it fluctuates too much for that to mean anything
buffalo 66 still gets me every time
Leon: The professional (International Cut)
I'm a big fan of No Country for Old Men right now. I don't remember the last time I went to see a movie twice in the theaters.
47.what are you going to do today?:
hmm, I'm getting kinda anxious to take a visit to the little boys room...
go to sleep, wake up, and get started on dying
Get up, print a paper, go to class, fuck around, go to work till midnight, fuck around some more and then go to sleep.
Well, it's 11pm, so I'm going to finish working my shift and go home.
48.do you sing in the shower?:
no, too paranoid
no
No.
No.
49.do you have any stickers on your car?:
dreams aren't that detailed
no
No.
No.
50.do you wear rings?:
no, but I should
sometimes
Yes, a pinky ring.
No.
51.what parfume do you wear?:
Gucci Rush as of sometime soon
none
I remember Allie once said that deodorant is the best way a guy can smell good because most colognes are just obnoxious, so I don't wear any.
Don't wear perfume.
52.what does your significant other wear?:
ck1.. taty.. giovanna baby..alfazema..
a glove :-o
A glove? What the fuck was that about?
Don't have a significant other.
53.who would be your celebrity dream date?:
John Cameron Mitchell
i'd like to go on a date with the girl from lost in translation
Keira Knightly!
No one comes to mind.
54.what kind of panties do you wear?:
hmm, I don't make a habit of such things
i don't
I've only worn panties once and they belonged to Beth Fulmer. Katie gave them to me to wear on 70s day in high school. I don't think Beth ever found out. I might still have the panties, they were purple.
Don't wear panties. I do wear briefs and boxer briefs when it's cold.
55.fav. music genre?:
I do not limit myself to genres
right now post-disco i guess
Pop from the 50s and early 60s, especially Roy Orbison.
Pre-Beatles pop and rock n roll music. And Brian Eno.
56.are you tired of this survey?:
only cause I need to piss
no, just tired
Not particularly.
Not really.
57.do you hate good byes?:
depends on who I'm saying goodbye to
sometimes
Sometimes, but not this time.
Hate is a strong word.
So there are four answers to each question--the first from when I was 16, the second from when I was 18, third 20 and fourth 22. I'm not sure how I remember to fill this thing out every other Spring, but I do.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
1.first name:
Trip (as of yesterday)
John
John
John
2.middle name:
Douglas (yea, it may sound funny, but it was a Scottish tribe that slaughtered a whole bunch of ppl, coo, huh)
Douglas
Douglas, and it was a clan, not a tribe.
Douglas
3.last name:
Clendenenenenenenenenenenenenenenenen.....
Clendenen
Clendenen, which is derived from The House of Gwendolyn which was part of the Douglas clan.
Clendenen
4.Have you ever been in love?:
Every chance I get
yes
Unfortunately.
Yes
5.do you have a crush?
I suppose, but I consider that an understatement by now :)
no
God no, also I think I actually had a crush on Andrea the last time I filled this out but chose not to mention it.
No
6.do you think your crush likes you?
no, she loathes my very existence, don't you Kami :P
N/A
N/A
N/A
7.could you ever be a lesbian?:
its at this point, I wonder why I was asked to fill this out.
at times i do think myself to be a lesbian trapped within the confines of a man's body
I watched Tootsie the other day and decided that I was indeed a lesbian trapped in a man's body. I wonder what it would be like to have sex dressed as a woman. I do seriously think about this.
No
8.top or bottom?:
I was always fond of tops as a child
is this a self esteem question
I really don't know how to answer that.
What?
9.victoria's secrets or fredricks of hollywood?:
none of the above
i don't wear underwear, and i don't really know what fredricks of hollywood is
I don't know how to answer this either.
What?
10.what color lipstick do you wear?:
whatever kind a girl asks me to
i prefer lip gloss
Usually a red.
Don't.
11.do you wear make up?:
well, there was this one time....
on occasion
When I'm in that kind of mood.
No
12.what are you wearing right now?
jeans, t-shirt, boxers, shoes, socks
scrubs, undershirt
A t-shirt that says "Fuck me I'm famous Ibiza" with women's dickies, a belt and my black panther slippers.
Hoodie, t-shirt, jeans and boots.
13.spit or swallow?:
sorry, I'm not that flexible
not my decision
There really is something more sexually appealing about a woman swallowing, but I'm not one to suggest or request something like that.
Neither
14.who do you love?:
ppl who aren't related to me
people, though not all of them
I'm not going to list all of you, but I'm sure you can figure it out, and if you aren't sure, then give me a call and ask. Also, my first answer to this question is kind of fucked up.
Several individuals to varying degrees.
15.what's your fav. color?:
I have no use for such a thing
selenium
I'm going to have to stick with selenium tone on Ilford glossy warmtone fiber paper.
Red
16.do you want to have kids?:
for dinner perhaps
no
No.
No
17.who do you look like?:
the boy in the mirror, hes been haunting me all my life
a fuckass
Do I look like anyone in particular? I don't think I do.
John Heder (or so I am told)
18.who are your friends?:
yea, this is where yout trick me into leaving someone out and then they get all pissed, you know who you are ppl
who is anyone
I hate these kinds of questions. You know who you are.
They are college-aged, middle class americans.
19.shower or bath?:
alone or....
shower
Shower, I have no patience for baths.
Shower
20.haircut?:
yes
no
I do need one if that's what this question is about.
I just got one yesterday. It is medium length and Amanda Klaus thinks I look like a girl.
21.haircolor?:
brown
still brown
You guessed it.
Brown
22.piercings?:
0
i used to have two on my left ear, but they have healed
No updates here, although I had forgotten that I at one time had a pierced ear.
None.
23.tattooes?:
they washed off
no
I had some temporary ones a few weeks ago actually.
None.
24.what's your fav. animal?:
all of them, they have more of a right to be alive than humans
i don't really prefer any one
Cats.
Cats.
25.are you angelina jolie or winona ryder?:
Hedwig
i am neither as far as i know
Keira Knightly!
Neither.
26.when's the last time you cried?:
hmm, 2, 3, maybe 4 years ago.
Sunday i think
When I found out my cat died (see a few posts back).
Don't know.
27.when's the last time you got high?:
first day of school, well, illegally anyway
um, allie, when did we see kill bill?
Two nights ago.
Around 6 weeks ago.
28.when's the last time you got drunk?
don't think I've ever actually gotten to the 'drunk' stage, severely buzzed at most
eh, when me, nick, and john went to john's beach house and it wasn't good
Two nights ago, although I had some wine earlier tonight.
Three days ago (a Saturday)
29.when's the last time you kissed someone?
last night
two sundays ago
I kiss lots of people on the head and cheek, but if that doesn't count, then March or April.
Two months ago.
30.do you bite your nails?:
when they get too long
far too much
Yes, I have done so ever since I learned what a bad habit was in kindergarten and realized that I didn't have one.
Yes, constantly.
31.what's your cutest attribute?:
well, theres this patch of skin at the end of my pinky finger that is about an 1/8 of an inch in diameter that I am incredibly fond of
some say my hair, some my eyes, some my attire, i say it's my arrogance
I'm not sure I'm qualified to answer this. I am told that my cheek bones are spot on though.
I haven't been cute in years.
32.do you believe in god?:
only when hes me
god is best used as a poetic device as far as im concerned
Yes, but I don't think he exists (Yeah that's right, fuck you St. Anselm, you're full of fallacious shit).
No.
33.coke or Pepsi?
cyanide
i drink water mostly
I read a study where they conducted the Pepsi challenge and measured the subjects' brain activity with an fMRI. Apparently, Pepsi is more pleasurable to drink if you don't know what you're drinking, but the cultural implications of Coke make it the preference of most Americans. I prefer Coke because I think cultural implications are just as relevant to a beverage as its chemical affect on the brain.
Coke.
34.do you have any pets?
yes, a completely black cat named Evil
evil and booboo
Evil and Booboo are both dead. I have no pets.
Donna.
35.what kind of car do you drive?:
the kind that dreams are made of
black t100 truck with a cover on the back
A green Ford Explorer which I call Little Green. RIP Big Black.
Ford Explorer.
36.hot or cold?:
depends on the location
hot
Hot, but just because it's cold right now.
Cold.
37.rain or snow?:
snow
snow
Snow.
Snow.
38.do you have any zits right now?:
c'mon, its one of my few insecurities, although the meds help a lot. um, dormant or active?
not too many
Probably somewhere.
Small ones.
39.are you crazy?:
I'd like to think so
i don't like that question
Probably.
Getting there.
40.what color are your eyes?:
blue I think
blue, green, and brown
Primarily blue and green, although there is a brown spot in one of them.
Blue and green with a spot of brown.
41.what's your natural hair color?:
brown
brown
Still brown.
Brown.
42.are you tan or pale?:
pale
pale
Moderately pale.
Pale, but not pasty.
43.how tall are you?:
taller than 5'7" apparently
around 6' with my plats on
Six feet.
Between 5' 11" and 6'
44.how much do you weigh?:
somewhere inbetween 120 and 125 depending on how long ago I ate
130
If I had to guess, I'd say about 135.
I haven't weighed myself for a very long time, but I think I'm 150.
45.what's you're favorite pair of shoes?:
the ones on my feet
the ones they used to have at leopard lounge until i got enough money to buy them
My payless dress shoes.
My black boots.
46.what's your fav. movie?:
right now, probably hedwig, but it fluctuates too much for that to mean anything
buffalo 66 still gets me every time
Leon: The professional (International Cut)
I'm a big fan of No Country for Old Men right now. I don't remember the last time I went to see a movie twice in the theaters.
47.what are you going to do today?:
hmm, I'm getting kinda anxious to take a visit to the little boys room...
go to sleep, wake up, and get started on dying
Get up, print a paper, go to class, fuck around, go to work till midnight, fuck around some more and then go to sleep.
Well, it's 11pm, so I'm going to finish working my shift and go home.
48.do you sing in the shower?:
no, too paranoid
no
No.
No.
49.do you have any stickers on your car?:
dreams aren't that detailed
no
No.
No.
50.do you wear rings?:
no, but I should
sometimes
Yes, a pinky ring.
No.
51.what parfume do you wear?:
Gucci Rush as of sometime soon
none
I remember Allie once said that deodorant is the best way a guy can smell good because most colognes are just obnoxious, so I don't wear any.
Don't wear perfume.
52.what does your significant other wear?:
ck1.. taty.. giovanna baby..alfazema..
a glove :-o
A glove? What the fuck was that about?
Don't have a significant other.
53.who would be your celebrity dream date?:
John Cameron Mitchell
i'd like to go on a date with the girl from lost in translation
Keira Knightly!
No one comes to mind.
54.what kind of panties do you wear?:
hmm, I don't make a habit of such things
i don't
I've only worn panties once and they belonged to Beth Fulmer. Katie gave them to me to wear on 70s day in high school. I don't think Beth ever found out. I might still have the panties, they were purple.
Don't wear panties. I do wear briefs and boxer briefs when it's cold.
55.fav. music genre?:
I do not limit myself to genres
right now post-disco i guess
Pop from the 50s and early 60s, especially Roy Orbison.
Pre-Beatles pop and rock n roll music. And Brian Eno.
56.are you tired of this survey?:
only cause I need to piss
no, just tired
Not particularly.
Not really.
57.do you hate good byes?:
depends on who I'm saying goodbye to
sometimes
Sometimes, but not this time.
Hate is a strong word.
20070910
Some thoughts on shock value and controversy
The escalation of that-which-will-shock-average-audiences-without-offending-them-enough-to-lose-their-attentions is fairly evident over the course of western civilization and most noticeable since the advent of modern art (circa 1863). Icons to leaf-censored nudes to battle scenes to piss christ is the sort of time table I have in mind. Of course, there have been instances where this progression took the form of two steps forward, one step back hence the censoring of previously created art with leaves, the burning of art, etc... Anyway, so this seems like a linear escalation of subject matter. The Battle of Algiers was banned in France when it was released (1966) and unbanned five years later. More recent films of controversy that have been recently unbanned include Cannibal Holocaust (unbanned in 1999 in the US) and Sweet Movie which remains banned in several countries and was recently released in the US by Criterion. In this case, controversial material suddenly deemed fit for mass consumption has changed from the politically and emotionally charged Battle of Algiers to the overtly and realistically violent Cannibal Holocaust and the strange sexual accounts of Sweet Movie which include instances of copraphilia, shades of pedophilia and a gold penis.
Concerning this escalation,
I recall being desensitized to a variety of things during my early pubescent years. I had the fortune/misfortune/opportunity to share my pre-adolescence with that of the Internet. Thus, by 14 or 15, I had been exposed to photographs of autopsies, war casualties, bestiality, lynchings, gaping assholes, aborted fetuses, every fetish imaginable and otherwise, and of course, a girl shitting liquid onto her face in a bathtub. I remember that I was utterly disgusted at seeing a video still of Pamela Anderson giving Tommy Lee a blow job when I was about 12. Two years later, I was mostly unaffected by a close-up photograph of a woman's vagina featuring several mouse traps clamped to her labia.
What does this mean?
I'm not entirely sure. It seems like a linear progression, but there is room for cyclical interpretation. For instance, though I have seen photographs of all sorts of ridiculous things, I have never seen someone executed. Public executions used to be common-place and well attended as their entertainment value was top notch at the time. Would I still be desensitized to these things if I were to witness them in person? I can't really answer that truthfully. Perhaps, in an age where penises in paintings and frescoes were being covered with foliage, more horrible things than what I have witnessed were occurring on an incredibly regular basis. If we were to switch the elements in each time period (a nude depiction to the dark ages and a public execution to the present), then both would be met with equal disgust and horror. In this sense, shock and controversy can be something other than a finite resource. They can be recycled from the norms of ages past. Perhaps in some utopian pluralistic future where all intolerance has been eliminated along with prejudice, audiences will look back in horror at Birth of a Nation and cringe knowing that a nation could be born out of such ideals. Filmmakers and artists of that day will create works dramatizing accounts of racism and the socioeconomic separation between minorities and majorities, and they will be banned due to content to be unbanned years later. Who knows? I don't.
Concerning this escalation,
I recall being desensitized to a variety of things during my early pubescent years. I had the fortune/misfortune/opportunity to share my pre-adolescence with that of the Internet. Thus, by 14 or 15, I had been exposed to photographs of autopsies, war casualties, bestiality, lynchings, gaping assholes, aborted fetuses, every fetish imaginable and otherwise, and of course, a girl shitting liquid onto her face in a bathtub. I remember that I was utterly disgusted at seeing a video still of Pamela Anderson giving Tommy Lee a blow job when I was about 12. Two years later, I was mostly unaffected by a close-up photograph of a woman's vagina featuring several mouse traps clamped to her labia.
What does this mean?
I'm not entirely sure. It seems like a linear progression, but there is room for cyclical interpretation. For instance, though I have seen photographs of all sorts of ridiculous things, I have never seen someone executed. Public executions used to be common-place and well attended as their entertainment value was top notch at the time. Would I still be desensitized to these things if I were to witness them in person? I can't really answer that truthfully. Perhaps, in an age where penises in paintings and frescoes were being covered with foliage, more horrible things than what I have witnessed were occurring on an incredibly regular basis. If we were to switch the elements in each time period (a nude depiction to the dark ages and a public execution to the present), then both would be met with equal disgust and horror. In this sense, shock and controversy can be something other than a finite resource. They can be recycled from the norms of ages past. Perhaps in some utopian pluralistic future where all intolerance has been eliminated along with prejudice, audiences will look back in horror at Birth of a Nation and cringe knowing that a nation could be born out of such ideals. Filmmakers and artists of that day will create works dramatizing accounts of racism and the socioeconomic separation between minorities and majorities, and they will be banned due to content to be unbanned years later. Who knows? I don't.
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